Desensitisation

What do we do when violence becomes everyday?

How should we react when the stabbing of a young boy is announced as straightforwardly as the weather forecast, or a holdup on the road?
When a criminal advocate is shot in front of his young son and other pupils at the entrance to a school?
When a mother of five doesn't know what to do one day as all of her sons are appearing in different criminal courts?
When armed robbers target a church on a Sunday as they think there'll be rich pickings?
When you've been in prison for twenty years, had your life turned on its head by Jesus but fear that your son is being drawn into the gangster world and don't know how you'll react if someone hurts him?

It's easy to say, "Trust in the Lord, ask Jesus what to do" but ....

I have learned that God can easily cut the Gordian knot of logical self interest, he can reconcile the seemingly disparate, but the lesson's taken a few years. What about those in the thick of it who haven't been granted that time? What do we say to them?  What do we do?

One church in Wellington is having a go.  Their Drugs and crime awareness film festival is planned for the beginning of December.  Films with storylines about the effects of drug abuse and gangsterism will be shown, young people and their parents will be encouraged to watch and stay for the discussion groups, reformed gangsters will share testimonies and insight. 

In South Africa many of the gangs are predominately black or coloured (not a pejorative term here).  The church organising the film festival has a mainly coloured congregation and will be able to speak to the poor areas of town but this is such a good opportunity to get congregations of al colours working together - all one in Christ Jesus. The issue affects everyone.  Some congregations can reach the people, others can help in the background.  What a wonderful witness it would be, and how powerful, if churches throughout Wellington united behind this attempt to break the cycle of crime and abuse and bring Jesus disruptively into the equation.

Hope Prison Ministry

This is Marvin.

He was brought up in a house of violence and fear with his extended family but without a father figure - no discipline, no love.
At seven years old he was raped close to his home by a man who is still known to him.  From then on he walked further and further into the darkness.  Soon the longest he'd spent out of prison was three months at a time.  Inside he was repeatedly raped but he joined the 28 prison gang, rose rapidly within their ranks and became a general.  No one can touch an officer but he can have his way with underlings: what men had done to him, Marvin now did to others.

Then Hope Prison Ministry organised a Restorative Justice course for the centre where he was being held.  The prison chaplains, who'd started praying seriously for him, recommended he attend and on the first day, cap pulled down over his eyes, arms crossed, face scowling, full of anger, hatred, mistrust and bitterness, Marvin sat and waited to see what it was all about.

By the third day he was broken.  He knew that he didn't want to continue the life that had dragged him so far down.  He was realising the pain he'd caused to others by his actions; he couldn't carry on in the darkness.

It's not easy to leave one of South Africa's fearsome prison gangs, violence and death are run of the mill to members of the 28s or 26s, but that night, back in his prison room, Marvin announced to the rest of the 28s that he was leaving.  They could kill him if they liked but he was no longer going to be part of the Number.

Obviously they didn't kill him as today he's an enthusiastic and vociferous advocate for the power of Jesus to turn lives around.  He now works for Hope Prison Ministries, taking part in Restorative Justice courses, sharing his testimony so others can escape their darkness too. With his wife he has four daughters, being a good father to them and breaking the cycle of broken families.
At one ministry meeting he called out to a man sitting at the back and asked him to come forward.  The man couldn't speak through his tears.  He was the detective who had arrested Marvin and seen him off to prison so many times.  Now they work together in Hope Prison Ministry.

Tips

I’ve had a relationship with Jesus for over 35 years.  Like any living relationship it’s gone through various stages but in all the time I’ve truly known him I’ve never regretted the day I decided to hand my life back to Jesus. He’s held me all the way. Sometimes I’ve had to ask, “Why? Why is this happening? Why am I here? Is this the right place, the right time, the right use of talents? I don’t understand,” but there have always been answers, not always coming as quickly as I’d like (perhaps because I’m a slow learner) but coming at the right time.

While visiting prison recently, one of the men who’d committed himself to Jesus three years earlier asked me for tips on how to stay the course. Many books and articles have been produced about the Christian journey with far more insight and depth than anything I’ll be able to list here but this is my attempt to answer his request.

Everything can be summed up by one sentence: nurture your relationship with Jesus. Talk to him; listen to him; expect him to communicate with you through the Bible, in the still small voice within, through other people.

Don’t automatically believe everything you hear or read by other “Christians”.  No one is infallible, people make mistakes, some mislead intentionally but God will never send a message to you or anyone else which contradicts what he’s said in the Bible. Some matters are open to interpretation but the fundamentals are not. Humanity rebelled against God and God responded by so loving the world that he sent his only Son, Jesus Christ so that all who believe in him shall not perish but have eternal life. He provided the only way to restore our relationship with himself and sometimes that’s all we need to know – everything else will follow.

Think of yourself as a plant that needs food, water, sunlight in order to grow and be strong.  It is possible to survive alone but it’s been discovered that even plants thrive more when they’re growing together. We may find the company of other believers rather challenging at times but we need them for support and encouragement and to help us see our weaknesses, just as we can so easily notice theirs.

Read the Bible in a translation you find easy to understand – it’s God’s love letter to humanity and he wants it to speak to our hearts.  It won’t do that as effectively if you’re struggling with the language.

Don’t put God in a box. Don’t expect him to work in the same way all the time. He is the Creator and creative beyond anything we can imagine. He wants a living relationship with you, not one that’s stuck in a Sunday straitjacket, whether that’s the formality of a conservative, liturgical denomination or the wildness of the Pentecostals. There is a season and a time for everything – exuberance, contemplation, admiration.  Be aware. Listen to him.  Expect him to do amazing things in seemingly impossible situations.  Following Jesus is only boring if that’s what you make it.

There is no “right” way to worship him, as long as our hearts and minds are dedicated to Jesus our Saviour.  Don’t let others imprison you in their own style and traditions but at the same time, respect your weaker brothers and sisters and don’t let your behaviour shake their faith. Always act in a loving and understanding way; in time they will grow and mature an so will you.

Don’t blame God when things go wrong.  If you examine the situation honestly, the root of the problem will often be your own pride, greed, laziness, disobedience, lack of love, trust and faith. It could be other people’s deficiencies in the same areas but it’s likely to have been made worse by your own bad choices.  Ask God to show you where the problem lies, to help you repent and change.  Remember that we live in a fallen world and the results of that are always with us: only through Jesus can things be made better.  God will not stop us doing stupid things, he will not always prevent bad things from happening to us, but he will never abandon us to face the consequences alone. Call on him humbly and sincerely and he will help. His way of helping may not be what we expect but it will always be what’s best for us. Ask what it is he wants you to learn from the experience and though the answer may not come immediately, at some point you will understand.

Choose to love, even when you don’t feel like it.  With our faults and failings we are often unloveable but Jesus loves us so much he died to make it possible for every human being to have a relationship with God.  God reached out to us first. When such love is shown to me, who am I to set conditions on the people I will love during my life? Love others as extravagantly as Jesus loves you.

Rejoice in the simple things. Recognise God’s hand in unexpected beauty, a kindness, a smile, magnificent mountains or intricately formed insects going about their business: there’s something to appreciate wherever we are. Join his fan club and feel his pleasure. It’s you he wants a relationship with; he wants to enjoy your company and wants you to enjoy his. Yes, it’s good to do things that please him but our actions should spring from the love in our hearts and not be seen as a way to move ourselves into God’s favour. There’s nothing we can do to change our status in God’s eyes as Jesus has done it all, but we can make him smile.

Sometimes we think life would be easier if there were a set of definite rules laid down for every aspect of day to day living.  Some denominations have tried their best to provide them.  Some religions (like Islam) are founded upon them. True Christianity is not a religion but a living relationship with Jesus the Saviour. A relationship cannot be developed bound up in legalism with laws and procedures to be followed under all circumstances.

Jesus confirmed only two laws for his followers: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and love your neighbour as yourself. This is the foundation of life but how these laws are worked out in our own circumstances will differ from person to person – there is no “one size fits all” life.  There is one foundation but all our buildings look wonderfully individual.

To summarise the key points:

Love – for God, for those around us; vertical and horizontal

Communication – with Jesus, with each other

Examination – where am I straying from the path God wants me to walk?

Rejoice – in all that God’s done and made for you

Freedom – whether behind bars or in the world, freedom comes from within, made possible by Jesus

Humility – I don’t deserve any of the good things that God gives me but I appreciate how he provides them

Ultimately remember it’s all about Him and it’s awesome.